I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize