he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
