Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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