...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
