how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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