yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
