you traded sex for a burrito?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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