well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
