I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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