Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Randomize
