were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
