It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
When are your genitals available?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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