I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize