i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
