I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize
