he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize