Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize