you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize