with your own penis?
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
