I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Randomize
