she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize