Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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