ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
