Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
