dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
