I'm drive I can fine osifer
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
