Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
