Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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