actually, I'm a sock model
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
