so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I want you more than these girls want KFC
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
