Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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