New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
