been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize