no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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