haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Fuck appropriateness.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
