You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
