Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
