But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
