i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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