She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
