piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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