I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
