my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
