first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
