I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
