That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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