Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize