wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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