no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Randomize