you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
